Keonah Days

There were still a few ears of corn sitting on the side of the grill so I grabbed one. I love corn-on-the-cob, if its really fresh picked. Something you can never really get in a restaurant. My mother used to husk and boil them, but Sam roasted them on the grill with the husks on. A little messier to eat, but an exceptionally sweet taste. I was partway through when my flirty friend arrived with two slices of cake, a think one for her and a fatter one for me. "Don't let that old biddy say I didn't feed you, Emmett Borden," she whispered. "I'll wait until you've finished your corn. Now I notice you eat typewriter style." Pausing my work on the corn, I questioned "typewriter style?" "An engineer and you haven't noticed? I'm disappointed in you, Emmett. You eat straight down the ear from one end to the other, turn the cob to a new row and start over again, left-to-right just the way a typewriter works, well the old manual ones at least. Others start at one end and eat clear around the ear before moving to the right." I admitted I hadn't really noticed and asked which way she ate. "Oh I'm a typewriter type too, but George is a rotator. I've often wondered whether there is some personality characteristic revealed by how people eat corn-on-the-cob. Maybe the typewriter kind are in a hurry to get to something new while rotators are more meticulous about finishing things up before moving on. What are you doing to do, hurry on to another gazebo, Mr. Typewriter?" "I don't really know, Phyllis," I replied. "I hadn't given it much thought. Rest for a bit I guess. I haven't been this active for what seems a long time. But of course, if personality can be analyzed by how one eats corn, then there are really more than just two types." I was going to show Phyllis how an engineer would examine her personality deductions. "Take the typewriter style eater, is left-to-right or right-to-left affected by being right or left handed? And maybe we ought to consider whether it would be more accurate to define the direction in terms of whether one eats from the large end of the cob to the smaller end, or vice-versa." Phyllis started to speak but I cut her off by continuing. ""Then, of course, one might be very efficient and reverse direction at the end of a row. And still another characteristic should be considered. Is he acquisitive if he turns the ear towards himself to get to the next row, or more inclined to giving by turning the ear away from himself? Of course that applies to rotators too, and also which end of the cob they start at. Which way does your husband turn the ear?" I would have continued my analysis but I could see she was getting bored and might leave so I changed the subject by asking if the cake was any good and whether Mrs. Olsen had an octagonal cake pan or used a round one and simply sliced off edges to make it octagonal. "Did you ever see an octagonal cake pan, Emmett?" she replied in an exasperated tone. "Anyway it's a four layer lemon chiffon. It's good but rather heavy on the icing. Men usually like excessively sweet things, probably to counteract their natural tendency to sourness. But you didn't answer my question." "You mean about another gazebo? Your husband and Sam had suggested the possibility of making and selling them, but I haven't really given a lot of thought to that yet." I stopped as I saw Mercer coming to our table. "What have you two been talking about so much?" he asked Phyllis somewhat petulantly. I answered for her seeing she was a little irritated by the tone of his question. "We were discussing the various ways people eat corn-on-the-cob. I can give you a briefing on the different styles if you're interested. I find it a fascinating subject and wondered if your wife knew of any historical references on the subject, being a home economics graduate, I understand." "No thanks, Borden." I had apparently set his mind at ease. "Business is my interest. And speaking about business, have you given any further thought about the proposal Sam and I suggested last time?" I told him I hadn't a chance to sketch any plans for estimating, wanting to finish this job for Mina before the summer was nearly over, but maybe I could do something within the next few weeks. He seemed satisfied and left to tell Sam. Phyllis was amused. "Thank you, Emmett, for opening his safety value. George gets jealous about my friends sometimes. Without any reason of course," she added carefully. "But don't you deliberately encourage it? I notice you don't seem to spend much time with the other ladies, or their husbands. Not that I have a complaint about your company. "Far from it, look at how much I've learned about corn and cake pans in just one afternoon." I wish the following to be on a dedication page: Dedicated to Betty Jo— We met when young, were cleft when old, and all those years between were gold.